Self-compassion is at the foundation of truly beginning to honour yourself. I personally love the RAIN concept of compassion taught by Tara Brach. When you find yourself experiencing difficult emotions or retreating into habits that don’t serve you, follow these steps –
- R – recognize
- bring awareness & presence to your feelings
- A – allow
- accept what is
- name what you are actually feeling
- when you name the emotion, it loses it’s power
- I feel guilty, sad, angry, resentful, tired, hungry, …
- I – investigate
- investigate a little further
- be curious
- ask why you are feeling this way & what it is you truly need
- N – nurture
- give yourself what you need
After you’ve completed the steps of RAIN, it’s important to take a moment to simply BE. Practicing self-compassion is about becoming your own friend. You are learning to truly listen to yourself & to receive an energy of love.
Meditation is a powerful way to cultivate self-compassion as it gives you the space to be and connect within. Learning to say ‘no’ is also a beautiful way of nurturing yourself. We often say ‘yes’ to others without realizing that by doing so we are saying ‘no’ to ourselves. When we recognize this, saying ‘no’ to others or to commitments becomes a little easier. It is an act of compassion towards yourself. As my husband often reminds me – Because someone throws a ball to you, does not mean you need to catch it!